Caution: This post could cause some hurt, pain and anger.... but it's truthful.

So lately I have been wondering why people don't say more of what they are thinking or feeling. Well, that's not totally true. I understand that people want to be liked, they want to belong, etc. Yet they go around expressing their thoughts and feelings to others instead of the person they have the issue with. I am the first to admit that I am guilty of this, big time. In fact I didn't even want to write this blog for fear of insulting or offending people or losing friendships. Then Nate pointed out to me that a blog should be a place to express yourself. I bite my tongue so often and then rant to others about whatever is bothering me. So here it goes......
        People frustrate, enrage and disgust me! When did people become so selfish??!! Why is it okay to put yourself in front of your children?! People are curious as to why their children behave a certain way and then as I listen to their concerns and their frustrations and more of their "story" it is so clear to me! You have taken away their security, their safety for your own happiness. Well no wonder, why is it not obvious to you?? If I came and took away your home, the bed you've always known, your security just so that I can be happy, wouldn't you act out too? What if you didn't know how to express your anger and frustration? What if you didn't have the vocabulary to do so? Wouldn't you show it through behavior? If you are placed in a stranger's home all day with no say on who you are with, what you do, where you go, etc and then picked up late at night to be quickly fed and ushered to bed, wouldn't you feel like you have no control and therefore act "out of control"?
Why can't people sacrifice toys, cars, houses, etc even their own happiness to be with their children and provide them with the happiness they deserve? I remember when being a parent meant sacrifice, it meant doing whatever necessary to make your child a happy, well rounded individual. Somewhere that changed and those children that had parents like that for some reason decided that they are entitled to unconditional happiness even at the cost of innocent children! When I speak with and watch these people I realize that they are not truly happy. They are gaining nothing from constantly taking for themselves and then comes divorce and total upset of their children's lives, and they are still not happy and cannot seem to figure out why. Sometimes, I just want to grab people and shake them, scream at them all the things that seem to make such sense to me! It saddens me that so many of these kids are going to grow up and repeat the same sick patterns.
         Then you have the parents that for whatever reason, be it social norms, divorce, guilt or whatnot seem to think that you must give your child whatever he/she wants, be their best friend, not set guidelines, rules or discipline. What?! How could that be a good idea? Children need and want guidance and leadership! Without it they have nothing but more chaos and emptiness. Could a business run without it? Then how can one think a child can grow and prosper without it?
What has happened to this world? Where is the love and compassion, the thoughtfulness, sacrifice and everything that separates us from the animals? It makes me sick and I don't know how much longer I can bite my tongue!
This post doesn't do my thoughts and feelings justice but it's start.......

Happy New Year!

     Wow! I can't believe it is 2010! 2009 seemed to fly by way too quickly! All in all I think we had a great year and I am excited to see what the new year holds for us! (sorry for all the exclamation points)
New Year's Eve  was one of the best I have ever had! We had lunch with family and it was great to meet Nate's Aunt, Uncle and cousin. After lunch we hit the movie store and rented tons of movies and then picked up a bunch of snacks and noisemakers. Once home we set up movies and snacks and just relaxed.... for about 10 minutes and then we couldn't hold back anymore! We pulled out all the noisemakers and hats and were INCREDIBLY noisy! It was great!! Finally we settled down and watched movies until midnight, the boys however did not make it, we watched the ball drop and pulled out the sparkling cider and made more noise, waking up Coda, who smiled and stumbled to bed. Melody also hopped into bed and we left the exhausted Cadence on the couch. Nate and I climbed into bed and chatted for a couple of hours. It was wonderful! New Year's Day we did absolutely nothing! We laid around, snacked on whatever we could find and were incredibly lazy as a family! Best New Year's ever! I am so anxious to see what lies ahead for my family and I!
I don't usually set resolutions, I think we should strive to be better all the time and should constantly  be making goals and whatnot for ourselves. I have decided that I have a couple of goals for the year, however. The first goal is to pay off all our debt and to set up dedicated savings accounts for the kids. The second is to go on at least one "expensive" vacation and on one whole family camping trip. We also would like to look for a larger place and plan to move, debt free, next spring.
Happy New Year all, I hope this year is as great or better than last!

Christmas '09

Well, we made it through the holidays! :) They were great! Christmas was quiet and very enjoyable. I decided to make a ham and a bunch of treats on Christmas Eve this year. So Nate came home to a feast, which we all enjoyed and then we let the kids open 2 gifts each. First, they opened up their gifts from one another, it was darling! Melody received a baby doll that drinks, laughs and cries real tears from Cadence,  Coda received 2 cap guns, a rifle and a pistol and some extra caps for them from Melody and Cadence received a firetruck that makes tons of noise from Coda. Then they opened up jammies from Mom and Dad, which they quickly put on for Santa. Then we made cookies and Melody insisted that Santa needed Eggnog since everyone else would be giving him milk :) and off to bed they went. We heard giggling and talking for about 10 minutes followed by silence.
Christmas morning we were woken up at 6:30, which was a bit of a struggle but so worth it! Watching the kids was wonderful and we took our time opening and playing with each gift. I baked up a few more goodies and spent the rest of the day relaxing. No where to go, nothing to do, it was wonderful! That night we took the kids to see the lights at the Layton Park. Though we missed family, it was a nice change to have a quiet, relaxing day. It was probably the best Christmas I have ever had!